I’m currently sitting in a coffee shop. Attempting to find an online version of Pride & Prejudice. I’m trying to keep myself preoccupied while I wait the three long hours before church begins. Ultimately, I’ve been finding it difficult to be alone and to feel contented while alone. I didn’t feel that way before. Or at least I don’t remember being.
I can’t help but allow my curious nature to wander off into the atmosphere around me. Listening intently to the clinging of the coffee cups and the faint clank of the spoon hitting the side. I await intently.
Theres a conversation between two young men. Both in the medical field I presume.. Most likely students due to their disposition. A brunette with a dusty novel sits ahead. Her hair falling across the table..She steadily acquires the room. Scanning with contempt before carefully placing her book and other belongings in her bag.
I long for something more than this city, this air is too stale and it rains far too often here. Similarity has bred its contempt in me, and I want out. At the same time reason and logic. The two voices opposed to my nature tend to speak at times like this. They interrupt my faint dreaming and quiet contemplations. Leaving me worried again. What if I never “make it?”